Apolo doggerel

[elsa]

Oh dear -- well, anyway here's a link to the Canadian thread in the UnApolo section where I answered ruff's post. It's worth a peek over there, if only to see Turcotte wearing that leprosy-outfit, surely the ugliest skinsuit ever! (though I wasn't too crazy about the Canadian diaper-suit or the stars-on-arms American one but they don't measure up to Turcotte's hideous monstrosity right here on this page:

apoloohno.proboards92.com/index.cgi?action=display&board=unrelated&thread=1145413699&page=21

[MT]

admin said:

Not to be a killjoy, but isn't there a Canadians thread in the Un-Apolo section? Please don't hate me...I'm just wanting to keep things...ahem...organized.

All these "off-topic" comments are heartily approved by moi. They can "hi-jack" my thread any time, if my vote counts for anything. Besides, the "topic" isn't a topic, it is a theme and that theme is witty ditties. The chatter is inspiration for more, so I better get on with it.

(Not that the Canook thread isn't inspiring too.)

[MT]

mt said:

OK, who de-karma'd me twice and didn't have the testicals to even mention why? That is utterly pitiful. Now I don't have the points to get that cool squirting ring at the Chucky Cheese prize counter and that REALLY steams me.

(MT, haha...please don't bypass the language filter...! )

Oops, I know I'm a difficult child and you are a saint to put up with me with good humor.

[MT]

Ruff said:

Ooh! You like the Canadians too, Elsa? I'm firmly in that camp myself. MT likes to flit in between America's and Canada's team. She's a bit of a trollop ("trollop" having the meaning here of "total player with an insatiable lust for tiny men in tight pants"). I can't remember what Fuzzy said. Honestly, I can't listen to a thing any of them say. They're too pretty to listen to. He was probably lovely and then nibbled a cracker (homeboy is a twig).

And you're right. Jean is Jones, Jones is Jean. Tentacles, man. And when you made that connection I sat here for a good 5 minutes making this face while saying to no one, "Oh my gaaaaaaaaa..."

MT, I have no idea what he's got in his lap there. I like to think it's some sort of adult toy. It would certainly explain the look on his face. I'm team Jang as well and am hoping he'll come out with some details. He won't tho, he'll go all stoic and man-ish. And KILL my dreams. Speaking of our team, did you see those pics from last week from Tina? Is it me, or did those pregnant doges OD on sunless tanner? They're Lohan orange! What's going on in their heads?! It's not for bathing in, for the love of god! Achmed is still pretty handsome (but clearly a douchebag) and Americanadian buzzed his hair off. The reasoning behind this remains unclear. I did love Allison in that photo. Looking all uncomfortably put together in a way that clearly screams, "I'M FEMININE! I'M A GIRLY GIRL! LOOK AT MY 'HIPS!' "

She has to say that, Tina stole her boobs and Julliane stole her wonder bra. Give her a break.

<and now to make this more topically kosher>

Oh Tina, you naughty girl.
Like a red cape to fans you unfurl,
Your vancouver pics
Of Apolo with two chics
After doing his star-dancing whirl.

Now Allison looks mighty pretty.
But J.'s dye job was getting quite sh-tty.
And whats with her breasts
Rubbing A's and Jae's chests?
Like her, they're a bit itty-bitty.

Zach and Allison make a cute pair
And I like her new style with her hair.
If his engagements done
He and Allison could have fun
Since claim her Apolo don't dare.

Have we discussed if Allison could be gay?
I know with Apolo we made hay.
It's not meant as a dig
But she and Koenig
Look quite good, at least some might say.

<I wonder if Noelle would want this one over on OZ? I hate for Tina to miss it. I get the impression she has a great sense of humor.>

[Lindsey]

Brilliant---just brilliant... *ROFL*

[MT]

Ref Jonathan, that Canuck perrenial favorite dude, retiring:



Darn that J.G. was really a peach
Looking like a dude fresh off the beach.
But he'd "surf" on the ice
And I hear he was nice,
Though a little too free with the bleach.

I wonder what plans he has now?
I suggest as a finale bow
He track down that Ruf
And show her his stuff
Solve a mystery and make her say "Ow!"

On the web she will post what she finds.
(I don't think J.G. really minds.)
At last we will know
What their suits never show:
Is it missing or are we all blind?

So J.G., for country and god
Let our Ruf have her way with your bod.
She'll be our proxy.
Though I too, have the moxey
I'll wait for Turcotte, am I odd?

[susie]

For that inspiring piece of doggeral, I hearby award you (so to speak) none other than "the pocket Adonis". Well done, MT! ;D

Ruff, take good care of our favorite blond shaggy-haired Northern surfer dude, and don't forget to make your report.

Meanwhile, at the SLC World Cup...Monette...mmmmm. Hamelin's rather easy on the eyes as well. Oh right, there's two of each!

[Lori]

"Two of each!"

Isn't THAT something? TWO Monettes and TWO Hamelins for Canada! Isn't there a gum ad about that? 'Double your fun...(?)'

MT, I sincerely hope you've also posted that on the Guilmette retirement thread at OZ - it's priceless!

[Casper]

Seems this J.G.’s still keeping y’all guessing
And we thought that those suits they hid nothing
Well, I’m rootin’ for Ruff
To take a peek at his stuff
And report back to all on the sighting.

Who knows though if she’ll want to share
She may just want to stare, stare, and stare
Will Ms. Ruff turn all greedy,
And not give us a look-see?
If she does, my guess is it was all there.



MT - Love your doggerel!! This is still one of my all time favorite threads on this site.

[Lori]

[glow=red,2,300]'Dueling Doggerels'[/glow] I love it! Keep 'em coming girls!

Y'all have said Ruff's name 3 times... isn't that supposed to be, like, magic or something (?)

EDIT: CRAP! - try as I might, I can't get 'Dueling Doggerels' and 'I love it' on he same line... just how stubborn can two phrases be?

[jennaceeta25]

Casper and MT..WOW!

That was enjoyable! Thanks!

[emtee]

casper said:

Seems this J.G.’s still keeping y’all guessing
And we thought that those suits they hid nothing
Well, I’m rootin’ for Ruff
To take a peek at his stuff
And report back to all on the sighting.

Who knows though if she’ll want to share
She may just want to stare, stare, and stare
Will Ms. Ruff turn all greedy,
And not give us a look-see?
If she does, my guess is it was all there.



MT - Love your doggerel!! This is still one of my all time favorite threads on this site.

Ah, Casper, You've named our worst fear
That those suits hide nothing, oh dear.
Send our Canuckian lover
On a mission to discover
This mysterious absence is quite queer.

If it's missing don't panic yet.
Remember, we once had a bet.
Don't start your weeping.
It's hid for safe keeping
Or modesty. No need to fret.

If not in their suits, then where?
Could it just be the cold rink air?
No problem for Ohno.
We've all seen the photo.
He and Rusty made quite a bold pair.

But our Ruf is up for this misson.
Of Canucks, she will hear no more dis-in.
She'll find it, I know
She's all over it, (you go!)
And J.G. will enjoy his submission.

[Lori]

Casper and 'emtee', I laughed myself to tears!
Never done this before, but I'll take a stab...

I'm seeing that Ruff is still missing
Could it be that J.G. she's now kissing?
Has she maybe found 'loot'
In that so-tight skinsuit -
Or is it our comp'ny she's 'diss-ing'?

(Hey, this is fun!)

I don't s'pose Apolo'd be jealous
Cause for him she's not really that zealous
Who would'a thunk
That to Ruff he's no hunk
It's about those Canadian fellas!

[emtee]

Don't worry, Apolo's no prude.
And we know he's a generous dude
With his time and his "loot"
Which sure is a beaut.
There's no doubt when HE's in the mood.

So allow her some Canadian fun.
Besides, when it's all said and done,
Though Canook's are Ruf's pick
When it comes to <Richard>
No contest, Apolo has won.

I may have to break a sweat to keep up with you guys. You are on a roll today.

[Lori]

Emtee, I'm still cov'ring my mouth
Cause your prose went decidedly 'south'
And it's looking to me
That if I do not flee
My good reputation's in doubt


I'll say that my cheeks are still blushing
From all of your fine Ohno gushing
But I think I'll bow out -
It's a sin, I've no doubt
And it's off to confession I'm rushing...