why do people stereotype Apolo?

[grnarcher9]

Making accusations and starting rumors are cheap and easy to make.

Maybe Posh and David Beckham and Katie and Tom Cruise are bi-couples because they like to hangout together. Maybe Hilary Clinton is a lesbian. How can she forgive Bill for all his transgressions if she wasn't gay. Maybe the whole short track olympic team are gay since we see them hanging around together all the time. Maybees....maybees...and more maybees... So stupid and pointless.

[elsa]

I don't think he's gay either because of the way he flirted with Julianne -- and Allison in an interview said, "I don't think he would want me to say this, but Apolo is very romantic." Now, of course, she could be bearding/covering for her good friend, but she doesn't strike me as the type to put her own life on hold to beard for him for several YEARS out of her life. Unless she's playing for her own team too, but wasn't she engaged when she and Apolo got together?

Anyway, if it did come out that he was gay, I'd be shippin' on him and whoever his boyfriend was. Now I need to go look up that sports psychologist guy you mentioned and see if he's single or married or what, lol. And what's up with Shani's private life?

ETA: You know, something Yuki said in an interview (assuming he really did say it) just sticks in my mind. He was worried about Apolo at 13 or 14 because he was in a crowd that was into drinking, smoking, and SEX. And Yuki was worried. So if it's gay sex, then he ships him off to an all-male dorm in Lake Placid to eat, go to school, practice, and share a bedroom and SLEEP with a few like-minded speedskating boys? Even though he's worried about Apolo being into sex so young? Hmmm. That would be weird, wouldn't it?

And it would have been easier for Apolo to not mention that girlfriend in his autobiography - he was only 19 so no one would take it as a sign he was gay if he didn't bring up the subject. But he DID mention her. And he talks a lot about being "authentic." Again, if he is gay, that's pretty weird too, because there was just no point in going out of his way to lie at that age in that situation.

[elsa]

Oh now I remember another thing that made me decide Apolo wasn't gay. There's a news report from that KOMO Seattle news station and this reporter, Eric Johnson I think, who's followed Apolo's career from like age 12 interviewed him and Julianne in their dance studio. He decides that he and Apolo need to dance (to help get votes is why he says - and he's afraid he'd creep Julianne out.)

Anyhow, it's not so much what Apolo says -- he says "Are you sure this is a good idea - people might get the wrong impression, I was the sexiest bachelor in '04..."

It's what he does. They discuss who's gonna be the woman in the dance and Apolo says he doesn't want to so Eric says he will. He puts his hand up on Apolo's shoulder, and IMMEDIATELY Apolo slapped his hand off his shoulder. He sort of shook his head in disgust, took a gulp, and sort of braced himself, and Eric put his hand back on his shoulder and Apolo started dancing with him. Eric says, "Aren't you gonna turn me?" And Apolo looked really grossed out again, and he does it, then let's go, and says "That's IT. Finito. The end" (or something like that - signalling that he wasn't gonna do it anymore.)

Now I get that it could all be acting - but if it is, he's a d**ned good actor, and he really ought to go into that line of business. He's got it down, all the way to the shuddering and the revulsion -- and Eric doesn't look too bad and they're bound to be pretty good friends after over a decade of Eric interviewing him and following him around (he went to LA and interviewed him there, more than once I think.)

And for somebody who says she doesn't care, I sure do argue alot

ETA: I did find out that Shani's two favorite cities are Seoul and, brace yourselves, Amsterdam. Ahem.

[epiphaniii]

First of all, MT, it's nice to see you here again.

Now, regarding this quote:

mt said:

If so, though, reading posts about how his fans are so sure he is hetero and so offended at suggestions he is not must be utterly devastating.

This is what most concerns me about topics like this.

No one in my "real" life knows much about Apolo, so I don't hear any rumors from them about him. However, I do find it disturbing when people (mainly other women and girls) get overly upset when someone suggests that a male celebrity they admire might be gay. Why does it matter so much to some? Of course the assertion that all men from Seattle must be gay is ridiculous -- I wouldn't even consider for a second that anyone who said that was really serious. But any guy "could" be gay, regardless of where they're from, and there are countless "legitimate" reasons why someone might wonder that about Apolo, or other famous males.

For female fans who don't know a particular celebrity personally to claim that they "know" he isn't gay just isn't logical to me. With lots of men, even their own parents, siblings, friends, girlfriends, wives and children don't know (because many, many gay [or bi] men do date and marry women and have children). So how in the world could fans, who just view pictures, television or live appearances of a chosen celeb, possibly claim to know that they aren't?

It seems far more plausible to me that people might pick up on subtle clues that a guy "might be" gay than that anyone could ever be completely certain said guy is "not" because, well, one just never knows.

Whether he is or isn't doesn't matter to me, nor would I consider it a bad thing. I like and admire him and that's that.

I agree that it must be terribly awful for any accomplished and admirable athlete or entertainer to feel that his fans would not support him "if" they thought or found out he was gay (whether he actually is or not.) I am NOT a fan of many celebrities and Apolo is the only one who ever inspired me to join a message board dedicated to him. That's what matters to me.

I have come to think, especially over the past few months, that I am an "odd" kind of Apolo fan. As much as I enjoy gazing upon his great beauty and am in awe of his many other admirable qualities, I have no romantic fantasies of dating or marrying him, nor do I dream of him marrying his dance partner. Therefore, I guess I just have nothing invested in blindly insisting that he "must" be straight.

Also, I have to say that I don't think that the people who might wonder this about Apolo and have followed his short track career for years are basing their opinions on anything related to his two-month gig on DWTS. That was a great accomplishment, but a small part of what he has done and what his speedskating fans have seen of him thus far.

[elsa]

I'm sure it must be frustrating for gay people to see the horror expressed when there are rumors that celebrities might be gay -- but still, they've lived with this their whole lives and I doubt that any of them are really surprised, especially when the ones expressing horror are female fans of a good looking guy. So I don't think I'd worry too much about the poor gay guys feeling hurt about it. Well, in GENERAL, I'm sure they're extremely wounded by that way of thinking -- but female fans would probably be the only "understandable" group of devastated folks, lol. Girls, even older women, DO have fantasies about their "idols" and a kind of vicarious thrill in imagining themselves in the place of the girlfriends and wives of their obscure objects of desire, and I bet, many of those professing shock/horror or whatever are not generally homophobic, just let down in that particular case.

And IF Apolo were gay, I think he's most definitely aware of the phenom (of female fans needing to believe...) -- and even willing to good-naturedly play along -- or he surely wouldn't write about his girlfriend in his book at the tender age of 19 -- or go on E News to say he's looking for a woman and what he likes in one -- or even go caveman on national t.v. and carry Julianne off into the sunset, so to speak.

I hope I'm not coming off as fussy or confrontational -- I've been trying to work on that -- I just don't think that this particular way of expressing a need to believe that someone isn't gay is as homophobic as it would be in other situations.

[MT]

epiphaniii said:

Oh my.
So how in the world could fans, who just view pictures, television or live appearances of a chosen celeb, possibly claim to know that they aren't?

Clearly, we must send out a research team. Any volunteers?

[tdav]

I feel like I'm being attacked here, since I am the one who said "I'm 1000% sure". Well, of course I don't know him, and I have to admit that I said that in frustration, if you will. This is just my opinion, I personally don't think he is. (And I don't have little fantasies about dating or being with him. I'm not that obsessed). And the situation regarding him not "making a move on Julianne", she's got a boyfriend and Apolo doesn't come of to me to be the kind of guy who's going to get involved with another man's woman. And if he is gay, why would he even tell Julianne? Like I said, I really don't like hearing these types of things about him, all this talk about him being straight or gay or blah, blah, blah because it really gets on my nerves. In fact, I don't even know why I posted here. So that was my own mistake getting involved in this topic. Not that I have a problem with gay people, because I don't, I just don't think Apolo is. I just think we should drop the topic. And MT, in your suggestion to find pictures of suggesting actions, I don't think that's a bad idea. We could certainly evaluate them. And could you (or anyone) post those pics of him on the ice with Rusty and the Koreans? I'd like to look at them. I don't think I've seen them. And I'm not trying to be mean.

[majestic]

tdavis - I don't get the impression that anyone is attacking you. It's just an open discussion, full of gossip and speculation, just like alot of other discussions we've had here. Obviously, it's going to be a touchy subject for some. But, I don't get the impression that everyone posting in this thread thinks he IS gay. I've posted what I've heard, but it doesn't mean I believe it - I don't believe he's gay.

[raingirl]

Personally, I don't care whether he is or he isn't. I don't think he's gay but the respect I have for him as a person would not change one bit if he was. He takes some mighty fine pictures that I'm gong to be looking at no matter what. I guess I've never understood the way people often feel they have the right to know everything about somebody in the public eye. Apolo's accomplishments stand on their own. He is the kind of person I would love for my son to become. Most of all, he seems to be a person that is happy with himself and the person he is. Works for me.

[lexi]

You raise some valid points in your post, epiphaniii. Trust me! - I have no illusions about ‘marrying’ Apolo. I'm not old enough to be his mom, but I'm certainly older. LOL Also, I don't think people are insisting he's straight or gay. They're just expressing their opinion based on their own impressions. As I said in my previous post, I personally don't believe he's gay, but it's really none of my business one way or another and would have zero impact on my support for him as a fan. The way I see it, if fans are truly fans, they're able to embrace the good, the bad..... and what others deem 'unacceptable' regardless.

We live in a society that is very judgmental. We are so busy condemning everyone else, we’ve forgotten to take stock of our own inventory. I judge those who are lax in their responsibilities and those who have no moral conscience. Parents, for example, who don’t know or care where their kids are at night or celebrities who think marriage is a joke. I’m far more worried about the state of affairs in these households than I am about Apolo’s sexual orientation. Far be it for me to expect that someone owes me an explanation as to how they conduct their life because I certainly don’t want to have people judge me on how I conduct mine. Also, I’ll never believe that any one in the public eye needs to come forward to make any revelations to appease me and my personal standard of living on such matters. So long as that person is a fine and decent human being, I could care less if they're gay. Apolo is very much aware of the media's manipulation and trappings. I'm sure there are times when he feels it would be easier to just speak up and defend himself against rumors. In this case, I think he’s wise in presuming that some things are just better left unspoken.

raingirl said:

He takes some mighty fine pictures that I'm gong to be looking at no matter what.

So what are you really saying? You only love him for his body?

[Lori]

Some of these stereotypes are hysterical...

1) Living in Seattle. Yet another 'fun fact' about Seattle to add to my travel diaries...

...yeah, and every guy in Texas is a cowboy, too. (Well, one can dream!)

(Might his residence there have anything to do with the fact that the Pacific Northwest has thriving Asian communities that might have been attractive to his dad, a young Japanese immigrant who spoke little English?)

2) Wearing tight pants. Are they talking about skinsuits? If so, then we'd better be concerned about our entire Olympic team. All the speedskaters, skiiers, lugers, bobsledders - and that's just covering the winter athletes...don't get me started on Speedos. I guess the only ones we can be sure about are the curling team.

IMO, when Apolo is on his own time, his pants are often quite baggy (esp. jeans).

3) Jewelry?. Some of our rappers and hip-hop artists wear enough metal to re-create the golden calf, and I double-dog-dare anyone to accuse Ludacris or Snoop Dog of rollin' in the other direction...

4) Trips with male friends. My husband has taken several trips with his 'best friend' - should I be worried? There was football and beer involved, however, so I guess it's okay.

I'll throw another one into the mix - he has a cat, rather than a pit bull...*gasp*

Now doesn't it all seem just a little bit silly?

[lexi]

Lori - your post left me in stitches. I'm sure living in LA you've seen it all! LOL If we were to follow stereotypes, I’d be sitting here on my laptop, inside of my igloo, in subzero temperatures with my snowshoes and dogsled team within arms reach!

Funny about the tight pants comment because I've always gotten the impression that away from the ice, Apolo is quite adverse to wearing anything that in anyway hugs his body. I can’t ever imagine what might make him so incredibly self conscious!

[lisam]

lori said:

I just find this whole thread very fascinating - partly because some of these stereotypes are hysterical...

1) He lives in Seattle. Yet another 'fun fact' about Seattle to add to my travel diaries...

...yeah, and every guy in Texas is a cowboy, too. (Well, one can dream!)

(Might his residence there have anything to do with the fact that the Pacific Northwest has thriving Asian communities that might have been attractive to his dad, a young Japanese immigrant who spoke little English?)

2) He wears tight pants. Are they talking about skinsuits? If so, then we'd better be concerned about our entire Olympic team. All the speedskaters, skiiers, lugers, bobsledders - and that's just covering the winter athletes...don't get me started on Speedos. I guess the only ones we can be sure about are the curling team.

IMO, when Apolo is on his own time, his pants are much too baggy for my taste.

3) Jewelry?. Some of our rappers and hip-hop artists wear enough metal to re-create the golden calf, and I double-dog-dare anyone to accuse Ludacris or Snoop Dog of rollin' in the other direction...

4) Trips with male friends. My husband has taken several trips with his 'best friend' - should I be worried about latent bi-sexuality? Or is it just that a trip to Hawaii with surfing and shave ice is more suspect than a football weekend with beer?

I'll throw another one into the mix - he has a cat, rather than a pit bull...*gasp*

mt said:

Clearly, we must send out a research team. Any volunteers?

Are you organizing, MT? Well, if the positions haven't been filled yet...*raises hand*

Love it! ;D
I've been reading everyone's comments about this topic and was trying to decide whether or not I should give my opinion. After reading Lori's words I think I'll say a few things.

I think its ridiculous to make assumptions about Apolo or any other male celebrity's sexual orientation by some things he does or says or whatever it may be! But we live in a society that has trained our minds to think this way. Years ago I wouldn't of thought anything about seeing 2 guys alone having dinner together in some restaurant. But now I sometimes wonder, are they gay? We feel like its become our right to know personal things about people when really it shouldn't be our right. Celebrity's are trying to be as normal as they can so when they don't want to talk about their relationships or other details about their lives than we need to accept that. They want their privacy just like we do. Talking about whether he's gay or not is pointless because in reality we will never know unless he comes out and says. IMO, I don't think he is just from what I've seen and I'm sure most people don't think he's gay either. I think we should just drop this topic like tdavis said. I think we would all agree that we love him for who he is, thats why we are all here.

[Lori]

Thanks, Lexi - I swear, every time I read one of your posts it leaves me thinking "yeah, what SHE said..."

Sorry - I'm chatty tonight. My husband is off to the Angels game with a friend *sigh* - it's a different guy every night these days...

[lexi]

lori said:

Thanks, Lexi - I swear, every time I read one of your posts it leaves me thinking "yeah, what SHE said..."

Sorry - I'm chatty tonight. My husband is off to the Angels game with a friend *sigh* - it's a different guy every night these days...

It's scary to think two minds are thinking as one - especially ours - isn't it? LOL And don't apologize for being chatty. It's nice to see some lively discussion tonight.

lisam said:

I think its ridiculous to make assumptions about Apolo or any other male celebrity's sexual orientation by some things he does or says or whatever it may be! But we live in a society that has trained our minds to think this way.

This is so true, Lisam and it's a very sad testiment to how society is today. There are times I think we've made progress and then I'll see something or read something and realize that stereotyping, racism, homophobia, etc, is still as prevalent today as it was many years ago.